The Danger of Driving Sharp Bargains
Every time I have ever seen someone drive a sharp bargain it has ended up coming back at the person in some negative way. People who get paid more than they are worth, or who receive more benefit than they provide, always run into problems, and have difficulty achieving success. The most successful people in the world are, for the most part, the ones who give more value than they receive. They contribute so much value that people want to do business with them, and to buy their products and services over and over again. When I [Read more]
Seek The Experience and Knowledge of Others in Your Job Search
Back in college there were men I knew who would always shadow other men at parties. The first man would typically spend his entire evening drinking and talking to a woman he met at the party. At some point he would have had too much to drink, and would start losing his focus. At that point the shadow would appear, and would talk to the girl and, oftentimes, end up going home with her. Since the woman was usually also a little drunk at this point, she was not processing if she liked the shadow as [Read more]
A Success Turn Around Formula That Works
I did so poorly in ninth grade that I still cannot believe it. I did not fail completely, but a problem was brought to my attention by a school guidance counselor when I got to eleventh grade. I was called into the counselor’s office and was told the following: “You got all A’s in tenth grade. Your academic performance this year has been amazing. Combining this with your being an officer of the student counsel, and a varsity athlete, you have really turned a corner. The only problem is that you had a 1.7 grade point average in ninth grade. If we were to forget about ninth grade and remove it from your transcript, you would be able to apply to any college you want. [Read more]
Vested Interests: Ask Yourself, “Does This Really Serve Me?”
One thing you often find is that there seem to be a great number of people out in the world whose chosen business is to make your life and circumstances, whatever they may be, seem much worse than they are. In fact, in your day-to-day life you are probably already continually surrounded by various people whose personal interests lie in making you feel bad about yourself and the world in general. Your success and ability to get on will in large part be determined by your ability to sift through all of this negative information coming at you. [Read more]
Women and Men, Planning and Unemployment
In my days of practicing law, some of the other young male associates were extremely secretive about sharing their personal lives with anyone in the firm. There were two things they did not necessarily want everybody to know about:
- Whether they were involved in a serious relationship, and
- Whether or not they had purchased a house.
Bad Manners, Rumors and Your Career
One of the risks you face as you progress in your career is rumors. People may make up various falsehoods and share incorrect (usually negative) information about you. These falsehoods can spread like wild fire and can literally destroy your career overnight. It is even more dangerous when there is an element of truth to these rumors and you do not speak out against them. Rumors can be created by your competitors, by someone who does not like you, or simply by a colleague for seemingly no reason at all. Regardless of the [Read more]
External Sources and False Conflict
When I was growing up I always noticed a fascinating thing with my older stepsister and many of the girls I knew. As I grew older I saw my girlfriends repeat this pattern. Once a girl would get a boyfriend, and as the girl started spending less time with her friends, her friends would eventually instigate some kind of conflict between the girl and her boyfriend. They might call her with a negative rumor, or they would fish for negative information about the boy and pass it along. They would inevitably find reasons to [Read more]
The Importance of Asking the Right Questions, Self Improvement and Perception
There is a famous story that comes from Buddhism, about a mother who loses her child. The Buddha was known not only as an enlightened individual, but also someone with the ability to bring the dead back to life. One day a woman approached the Buddha, begging that he bring back her child from the dead. “I hear you are compassionate,” she said. “Please bring my child back to life.” The Buddha says, seeing the woman’s despair, “Please go and find me a mustard seed from a household where no one [Read more]
Karma, Universal Laws and Your Career
I have known and encountered many people, and I have always pondered over why some people are happy and why other people are unhappy with their lives. Several years ago I began seriously observing someone I know who is extremely happy. Everything this person gets involved with seems to go his way–without fail. He has never had any enemies, and is always smiling and laughing. In fact, if you are ever in the general vicinity of this person, you always can tell exactly where he is because of the telltale giggles. I have spoken to other [Read more]
See the Connection, Not the Differences
There is a famous story about Charles Darwin hiking through the countryside in England with his friend:
“There’s an abundance of clover here,” observed Darwin. “This district must have many widows.” The two strolled on, Darwin enjoying the country air, his friend lost in deep contemplation. At last, the friend tugged the great scientist’s sleeve. “What has clover to do with widows?” he asked. Darwin smiled and explained, “An abundance of clover needs many healthy swarms of bees to pollinate it. Thriving bee hives mean there are few rats to raid and ravage them. A scarcity of rats spells an abundance of cats. Who keeps and feeds packs of cats? Widows, of course.”
In Buddhism there is a principle known as Pratityasamutpada. Its most literal translation is the together rising up of things. What this means, essentially, is that all things are interdependent. Each individual person, place or thing in the world is the result of a collaborative process, and a combination of many interrelated elements. Buddhism sets forth that a large part of our unhappiness comes from our failure to grasp this concept of Pratityasamutpada. Instead of seeing ourselves as interdependent and of relation to all things, we see ourselves as separate, and we set up belief systems that maintain and enforce this fallacy of thought. Something that really fascinates me is the way people have historically communicated using various symbols. A fun place to visit if you are ever in Las Vegas is the King Tut museum. Museums of ancient history such as this consistently demonstrate the symbols that different cultures have used throughout history to communicate. Whether you look at the pyramids in Egypt, the cave paintings in France or in rural parts of the United States, prehistoric art in China–or elsewhere–ancient cultures have all used similar symbols. One of the most dominant symbols that different people have used is an animal with wings; this particular symbol is often worshipped. It could be a winged bull, a winged snake, winged horse, or winged dragon. Regardless, this image appears throughout various cultures time and time again. The idea of animals (other than birds) having wings seems to be celebrated by virtually all civilizations. Wings are symbolic of freedom. They represent becoming something powerful, unique and enlightened. Having wings seems to elevate a creature to an almost godlike status, whereby it is empowered to break free from all limitations. In addition to appearing in prehistoric art, winged creatures also appear as the subject of numerous myths throughout various cultures. In many of these myths, an animal (or sometimes a person) goes into isolation and emerges with wings. In other stories, such as the legend of the phoenix, a bird dies in a fire, and from the ashes emerges a new, revitalized phoenix. All of these ancient symbols seen in art and mythology represent the process or journey of transformation that is undertaken by all forms of life. Most of us have an innate desire to transform ourselves. We believe that deep down there is something that is imperfect with us, which can be made better–and we want to rise above the world and our conditions within it. Because our desire to experience transformation is so important to us, it is something that we should honor. The idea of becoming something better and more significant than we are is valued by all people. At the same time, this need to transform, to escape and rise above seems inconsistent with our [Read more]
